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Sunday, May 4, 2008

Untouchable

This is the sequel to "Three Simple Words" in some regards.

Who loves to receive hugs? I do. Do I get them as often as I would like? Nope. Sometimes I dont get any. My preference is to get hugs everyday. Now I dont mind giving hugs either but I have a slight problem with that. I try to read body language to see if when I do want to give someone a hug if I'm forcing myself upon that person, and sadly I have forced myself upon people to give them a hug.

The reason being for this and the reason I have titled it "Untouchable" is because so often I feel like I am. I am the person people dont want to hug or the person they dont want to be touched by. If you tell me you love me, I leave mentally and emotionally because flat out I dont believe you. If you hug me it shows me that you actually care because you decided to touch me and then maybe I will be more receptive to the words I love you. Huge maybe.

Jesus has a lot of work to do here. There are only 8 people who I will say "I love you" to and even then that is on a very very very rare occasion. I'll take a bullet for anyone, but I wont say I love you.

Man, I am one screwed up individual. I am very grateful I no longer have to do this on my own anymore.